Nightmares and Reflections

Jan 14, 2008

Just woke up, had a dream it goes like this. I'm standing in this place, no idea where, a black fence behind me and a ruined city beyond it. Same cityscape stretches before me and I'm quite scared because I instinctively know there’s something after me. So I just look around frantically. All there is are ruined buildings and wrecked cars then I see it on this far away rooftop.

I may draw monsters but that is because of my affinity to mythology and folklore. Now the creatures in my nightmares are just plain demonic. I say this because they exude this... menace that I just know if they catch me death isn't the worse thing that can happen. They feel unnatural and evil in a complete and utter sense. This time it's a pitch black, taller than me creature yet hunched. It carried its hands close to its body like someone with arthritis while it stood and sported rather long talons. It had no eyes or remarkable facial feature besides its mouth which was always gaping and full of shark-like teeth.

It also had a long spiked tail and this glossy fluid black to its body, organic like a beetle or something vile and alive that shouldn't exist. It had like this darkness, it was dusk or dawn in the dream yet it had this darkness around it. You couldn't stare at it or fix your eye on it. It danced about and hurt the eye.

It stands on a rooftop far away. Simply standing there looking a different way. There’s about a low wall and about 6 houses in between us. Then my heart speed up and it jerks his head around lightning fast and looks at me, well he doesn't have eyes. Yet I feel the horror of being looked at by something without eyes.

Suddenly it jumps down then crawls down the wall like an insect. I'd look and wouldn't see it because it'd be crawling up from behind one of the houses and poke his head up a closer house and keep crawling. This scary out of sight for some time, getting closer tempo froze me to the spot.

I snapped out of it and climbed the fence reached the other side to find more ruined city. I kept running down streets. The creature kept appearing around buildings, clawing and crawling. Getting closer with each moment. Somehow always crawling up from behind buildings and never touching the ground. I arrived at a park that had no grass just a bunch of wrecked cars, dirt and trash with another fence in between. Looked behind me it was closer 2 buildings behind me crawling down the first one to reappear over the corner of the second one . I wanted a weapon so looked around and got a chunk of concrete I instinctively knew it wouldn't do anything against it but kept it anyway.

Then I climbed the fence. Looking back at it that part of the dream is silly though it was dead serious when it happened. It was a rather tall fence I climbed it with one hand holding while the rock in the other. Go me. The creature started crawling up it too faster than I expected. I got to the top and threw the rock hit it in the head. It fell off. I jumped off and landed on the other side.

With the fence in between us we stared at each other, the damn thing didn't have eyes but I knew it was looking at me the same I was at it. It's mouth was drooling, the hands tucked against it's chest again like some grotesque arthritic monster. There was this unspoken "I will get you no matter what, you can't hide, you can't run and death isn't the worse fate you can suffer."

We stood facing each other I don't know for how long. Then when I turned away it started crawling up the fence but slower than before. Deliberately slow. Savoring it. I tried finding a weapon, I pulled on some rusty car parts. The creature just leisurely ascending all the while. become frantic then come across a great heap of plastic. It was like a sheet, big and dense and and then an actual voice in my head, a clear female voice, said: “Nothing can hear you, taste you, see you, touch you, kill you, find you or get you when you’re under it”. Looking back at the dream that is the weirdest factor that it was the first noise in the whole dream. Everything up to it was mute. The running, the fighting and the climbing was like a silent movie.

I crawled under it and kept crawling deeper into it. It was dense, heavy and suffocating. Yet I kept hearing the voice saying nothing could find me or get me while under it.

Then for the second time I heard sound, real sound no doubt about it.

Footsteps, clawed, close and slow. My heart started beating faster and faster. I could hear it like a drum in my ears and thunder in my chest. Then I remembered how the creature noticed me in the first place and my heart just went faster. It didn't need eyes to see. It would sense me or hear me.

I started not being able to breathe under the plastic thing and my heart just went faster. Everything narrowed down to my frantic heartbeat and the slow clawed footsteps getting closer. Then I start babbling out loud to myself that it can't find me under it. The frantic self reassuring would be another of the few singular sounds in the dream. I think they're all important and linked somehow.

Then sheet started on me started moving like something was stepping on it close. I started panicking, all I could hear was my blood rushing, me suffocating, my heartbeat and the clawed footsteps.

Then they stop. I simply can't breathe. I'm just gasping like a landed fish trying to say it can't get me. Clawed hands touch my back through the plastic sheet.

“Found you my love" it says in a raspy female voice. I know then as a fact death isn't the worse that will happen and start to scream and thrash. It was all so vivid. I didn't wake up as much as jump up covered in cold sweat, hyperventilating with my heart in my throat and scared out of my wits.


I’d like to know why I’m always jumping fences, fighting monsters with inadequate or no weapons and always in ruined city-like landscapes. Anyone know what any of those mean?

I barely see any normal human beings. I see, run away from, talk, interact with stuff like:

A half goat man trying to kill me with an axe.
A 600 pound man in a diaper.
A man in a tuxedo with a clean shaved head and pits of darkness for eyes.
An angry mob whose faces shift between demon and human while they howl and scream.

The normal human beings I see are people I know which I’m usually trying to save or am screaming at them to go away while I die some bloody death protecting them.

The dread the malignant creatures inspire in me is a peculiar one. I am not scared of death. I've gone through depression and all that goes with it. I've had people I love die from different causes, some cancer. Others currently have cancer. I've learnt to accept dying as a part of life, something inescapable and not to be feared. But in my dreams to actually feel fear I just get this indescribable dread at being caught because there is a promise of a fate worse than death. I saw a lady go into coma and almost literally rot away, that does haunt me. I know they want to catch me and carry me off to somewhere. Where to or why I have no idea maybe endless torture or eating my soul, I don't know. It does intrigue me trying to figure out my warped psyche though.