Ha! I saw a racoon today! For some odd reason I had a sort of primal urge to chase and catch it and I started stalking slowly torwards it. Then common sense kicked in and I considered the thing bites and might have rabies. I always had a thing when I was little about catching wildlife and letting it go. Still do actually if there was a mouse, lizard or bug inside a classroom I'd catch and release it at school, at school I did that since kindgergarden all the way to senior year, much to everyone's amusement. I do it by instinct which I realized when I started stalking a huge racoon
Some kids used to enjoy upsetting me by killing bugs infront of me and hear me start explaining that they shouldn't and how they have no reason to kill it. Pointless killing will always bother me no matter the size of the creature. I don't mind feeding my snakes or scorpion back home because you know they have to eat and it's a natural cycle of life but if there's to be death it should be quick or part of the life cycle. Unless you gave me a rapist or a child molester then I'd have no problem with slowly vivisecting them. I do get very sad when I step on snails by accident.Anyhow I'm feeling a bit better basically because I get all the stuff and grandpa fed in the morning then he falls back asleep without fail everyday and I talk on the phone with a very good friend who is rather quite interesting and fun
though she says I don't bore her even when I go off ranting, explaining about society, anecdotes of my life (which has been pretty odd), denoucing politics and mankind or explaining complicated concepts. Which is a first actually. I'm not entirely convinced I don't bore, weird or confuse her because everyone I've talked to falls into either one of the three or a combination but 
I thank her dearly anyway she rocks my socks and keeps me company.I feel really alone basically because grandpa's kinda gone for any sort of multiple sentance conversations and my aunt well she's herself. She showed up in my room at 5a.m. I woke up at 4 something and was just staring at the ceiling as has become a regular basis to me. The people upstairs had been moving stuff and shuffling for awhile which had me extremely confused on what they could be doing at 4 a.m. so my aunt comes over and asks why I'm awake, I could ask her the same thing, I said my sleeping pills wore off which generally give me 6 hours of sleep then I wake with the certainty of the sun's rising. She starts going off on how she's heard noises from my room and how what I basically call her noise discipline works so the people above don't hear us at all. She is obsessed over that and cleanliness. If you really asked me my best guess is that the people upstairs told her they'd kill her if she heard a peep from downstairs. Which is ironic because they wake me or keep me awake moving or talking sometimes so I don't get the obsession. So I'm merely staring at her while she's telling me how I must be quiet and then goes off on how she knows why I don't sleep because of the sugar on the vitamin water I drink. She goes on and on getting more patronizing and I start getting slightly annoyed but I stay silent. My vitamin water is sugar-free... she basically lives to keep up with her soaps and get further brainwashed by the media. She'll believe in anything from aliens, scientology to psychic attacks for the mere fact that: "The people who write or film programs about things like that are learned people who have done research" the same way she belives the media doesn't lie ever so she chases after me telling me the chicken flu is going to kill me or my Ipod's going to make me deaf. She believes germs are a 21st century thing that must be fought compulsively lest they doom us all. I'm sure she'd projectile vomit if she knew that when mom worked long days and school pressured me I basically stopped doing my chores which of course nobody else took up and the house would get really bad. I once remarked to mom the ant problem we had was good because it didn't let the maggots breed in the piled dishes. I love mom when we don't fight, we usually joke and keep a cynical, dark yet strangley optmistic outlook and humor.
My aunt is trying to make a bio-dome of cleanliness and sanity and it's basically a compulsive circus act but oh well. I'm a guest so my almost limitless patience is backed up by my strong feeling of duty. I'll weather this but I have a feeling it'll be testing.
There has been thunderstorms and rain for 2 days straight by the way that makes me VERY happy. I know it might be weird but it always has
Things are sort of looking up.. sort of
I'm taking care of grandpa and he's feeling better and looking better. I feed him twice a day, give him his pills and play classical music for him then do chores around the house which I've gotten the hang of. I have someone to have comftrable and expressive human contact with I might go college hunting soon Hmm I was slightly ranty earlier perhaps, I think that means I'm healthy well in my own way 
Mentally and Will Power-wise I've put myself together and am ready for another round, physically I might be a little affected but physical issues be damned. I ignore these things like pain and sickness because...
I'm a plain stubborn bastard who lives by:
I've survived worse, doctors just want my money, willpower overcomes any obstacle and what can't be cured must be endured.
Death to the Napkin people! Probably only Draco will understand that
To the forums!
-update- Um
new dA so.. How the hell do I actually find or go to the forums? 
tad lost here
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