There is something wrong with me

Well after the aforementioned horrid attempts of interacting online with other human beings I just made another messenger account and started talking with myself.

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Seb: I is serious cat!
Sebastian Fuentes: no thee is not
Sebastian Fuentes: take that back
Seb: make me
Sebastian Fuentes: I SHALT MURDER THEE AND CAST THY INNARDS TO THE SEA DRAGONS
Seb: Thou shall try
Sebastian Fuentes: and succeed...
Seb: villain I say!
Seb: villain!
Sebastian Fuentes: How do does thee dare!
Seb: I'm not sure...
Sebastian Fuentes: I is serious cat here!
Seb: Nay!
Seb: I is serious cat
Seb: I is the most serious cat to talk this earth in the last ten thousand years!
Sebastian Fuentes: I is the most serious cat to walk this plane of existence in the last ten millennia!
Seb: lies I say!
Sebastian Fuentes: truth
Seb: if indeed
Sebastian Fuentes: yes?
Seb: Where do babies come from?
Sebastian Fuentes: I'm... I'm not sure...
Seb: aha!
Sebastian Fuentes: well do you know?
Seb: um no...
Sebastian Fuentes: Woohoo I win
Seb: you don't know either ayah silly face